Today I ordered underpants from the Internet.
The Internet has kindly agreed to send me some underpants sometime in May.
Actually I went on the Victoria's Secret website in search of bras and underpants (guess what...they have some), and after looking at dozens of pictures of frilly and lacy and embroidered lingerie with ribbons and bows and tassels and puckers and pleats guess what I ordered...
That's right...plain cotton underpants. I think I am the most reasonable (read: dull as carpeting) girl in the whole world.
Perhaps I was mesmerized by the selection of significantly less reasonable underwear...and when it came time to place my order the only thing that came to mind (through the frilly, gauzy fog) was the same thing I always buy: plain cotton underpants. But I am comfortable with my routines and I doubt I shall be disappointed.
Now I DO realize that since what I bought is available at any number of local underpants retailers, I could have made the same purchase here and received my goods immediately. But since I can wait and I wanted my plain cotton underpants to have an air of sophistication to them, I went ahead.
And I also hesitated for a second when it dawned on me that I would not be able to try them on, but then I realized that I never try on underwear anyway - I just buy a small (because that is what I would like the parts of me WEARING the underpants to be) and if they don't fit they go into the drawer of clothing items that I will be wearing when I wake up one morning with the body of a supermodel. On ME I mean...not dead from a heroin overdose beside me, just so we're clear.
And I wanted to have matching boring bras to go with my parade of boring underpants.
Next week...opaque tights (you all might need seatbelts for that one).
Also, please don't tell my son that I blogged about underpants. I will have no credibility the next time we are at the Olive Garden.
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4 comments:
Underpants.
Underpants. Underpants. Underpants. Underpants. Underpants. Underpants. Underpants. Underpants.
Simon, you stole my response!
Honestly Joelle, are you really surprised that Sammy's favorite word is underpants? Hmm, wonder where he got that one.
Enjoy your new ginch. Or knickers. Or tighty whities -- can girls wear tighty whities, or is that just a boy thing? Anywho..... have fun.
heck, the lacey ones are too itchy and the fancy pants only srawl up the butt.
You made a wise selection.
(and I'm glad I'm not the only one with wishful thinking underwear in my drawer)
child, you must post more!
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